This is in human nature that we all in one way or another feel like we are less than others. We are less talented than others, we are less good looking than others, or we are not as smart as others and so on. Sometimes these doubts born in us because of having low self esteem & lack of confidence and other times because of others continues criticism.
Having self doubts can be occasionally over disturbing and can affect us in much negative way we can even imagine. Studies say that too much or for over time, low esteem can cause depression. And lack of confidence will leave you behind in contrast to others.
In the world full of selfish people who are obsessed with worldly material, and who even want to gobble others right, if you will not believe yourself then who will? Stop questioning your abilities & capabilities and start working on self growth.
Self doubts further stops you from self growth. Here are some ways that will help you deal with self doubts.
- Acceptance:
Accept yourself. Acceptance is always the first key towards self growth. Or I should say for everything. You don’t need to be exceptional in order to accept yourself or feel proud of yourself but you need a feeling of appreciation and gratitude. Accept that everyone is better than others in their own way.
2. Be confident & positive:
Build a sense of positivity in yourself for whatever you like to be or to do. And that positivity will build a castle of confidence in you. If you will think positive, negative thoughts won’t cross your mind each time you are about to show yourself up for something and you will be confident enough to cast a genuine smile.
3. Don’t self reject:
Don’t ever self reject. This is a very bad habit people possess in them, self rejection. Before even asking someone about/for something how can you just assume that they would say ‘no’ or they wouldn’t like. Did you influx in their mind? Unless or until they themselves don’t give their opinion you cannot presume. Period.
4. Don’t underestimate yourself/ Don’t lie to yourself:
Before even close to trying, giving yourself an excuse that it is tough and you cannot do is like underestimating yourself. Stop lying to yourself that you will lose the race before even showing yourself up at the starting line. Don’t forget ‘everything is hard before it is easy’.
5. Don’t give second thoughts to your choices or decisions:
This is very important to understand. If you like something, then be sure of it. Be confident that your choice is great or the decision you take is right. Even if it is not then at least you think so. Nobody has right to change your taste or you shouldn’t be a fool to believe that your choice don’t matter because your choice matters. Only your choice matters when it comes to take decisions regarding yourself.
6. Stop being scared:
When I was a child I never used to raise my hand when teacher ask question. I was afraid to speak my mind. I get scare what if the answer is wrong. But when I grew up I realize that being wrong isn’t a sin. Why should I get scared then? It’s okay to be wrong.
Think about a time when you had some doubts but you didn’t ask and attempt wrong. Wasn’t this an act of foolishness? What if you had ask, you wouldn’t had failed. At least we should be confident enough to speak our mind and put forward our idea.
7. Take mistakes as a lesson:
As earlier we discussed that speaking your mind even if you’re wrong isn’t a sin. It is a chance to correct yourself and learn from your mistake.
We cannot be always right and that’s a fact. Acknowledgement of your mistakes and try to change your perspective/attitude towards it comes in the bucket of your choice.
8. Don’t take people criticism:
There are many people who talk bitter. Even if you give your best shot they still will criticize it somehow. But it is up to you how to deal with it. And what you should do is take criticism like a boss.
If someone tries to put you down rather taking it to heart and then hurt them, go gracious. Say may Allah give you more or may Allah always bless you like this.
9. Take help from people close to you:
Don’t take advice from anyone and everyone. Also, here I don’t mean everyone close to you because we are often close to many people. But those who are positive and intelligent enough to help you give beneficial advise without shaming you. When it comes to take help be very selective. You don’t know what impact they can have on you.
10. Stay away from negative people and close to positive people:
Do I even have to explain this point? Aren’t we have experienced much to understand this?
Still a humble advice, stay away from negative people because all they think is about themselves and not anyone else. If someone can’t view your dignity as theirs, leave them.
Be with people who motivate you and try to bring out the best in you. And you feel at ease with them.
11. Accept that people can have their opinions:
Apart from those people who have ‘no mind and no business’, respect other people opinions. You should know that they can have their opinions as we all have a different point of view and different perspective on life. You should be respectful enough to listen to them and try to comprehend them. Who knows there is a hidden wisdom for you or you might explain your point and take them to your side.
12. Stop stressing over what might happen/ Don’t stress over consequences:
The first thought that comes in the mind of a person who has low self esteem is what if it doesn’t go the way I want or what if something goes bad!
If you’re a hard worker you don’t need to stress about these small things. Because you should know in the end ‘hard work pays off’.
13. Don’t wait for the praise from others:
Don’t wait for others approval when they don’t wait for yours. Be your own hero. Praise yourself for every small accomplishment. Tell yourself you did better. You know why? Because self-praising means self-motivation, self-motivation means self-assurance and self-assurance means self-confidence.
Final thoughts:
It is impossible to not have self-doubts but to overcome it is in your hands. Try to avoid negative and over thinking and always be positive. Nobody is perfect and hence everybody make mistakes. Perhaps you think of yourself as a little more imperfect but you can’t be a complete dull.
Change yourself and try to take full advantage of the opportunities that come your way and build your self-confidence. And never forget you’re the best.
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